A little to the left.. more.. just a bit more.. . there..

Today we're going to learn about other people's bodies.  Certainly the time will come when I feel the need to pontificate on a topic involving our own bodies (wait.. wasn't that a book?), but for today it's all about being selfless.

Specifically, we're going to talk about where to find Happy Fun Spots (other than the Primal Three, of course, because they're obvious and if I have to point you in *that* direction you perhaps should think about whether this blog is right for you.  ;) ) on your partner.  We like to please our partners, don't we?  Of course we do.  And while the Primal Three are loads of fun, they shouldn't be played with to the exclusion of all the other Happy Fun Spots.  No, dear readers; the road to the Primal Three should meander past all sorts of nice little places that make our partners whimper and beg.

This is by no means meant to be an exhaustive list- more of a introduction.  And really when it comes down to it, *any* spot can be an erogenous one when approached with the right attitude.

That said, down to it.  Take out your papers and pens, darlings. 

Let's get the easy one out of the way first, because everyone knows the number one answer to this question, right?

Right??

Yes, you in the back- how sweet that you thought to raise your hand first- you're correct.  The brain.  Else why would you be putting up with my ramblings?  You'd be off somewhere engaging in the acts I describe, or at the very least watching them on TV.

What you can imagine, with the descriptive assistance of another, is frequently more arousing than the reality (I have endless stories of all the things people I know thought would be A Great Idea To Try, only to find out the fantasy of it was way more fun).

A geek-based example:  weren't the Clone Wars ever so much more interesting when you pictured them in your head?  Among all the other things he ended up destroying, Lucas really screwed that one up when he brought it to the big screen, didn't he?

Mhm.  Thought you'd agree with me.

Engage the brain, engage the rest of the system with it.  Unless you're gagged, you should be talking.. before, throughout, and after (because down time should ideally be spent working up to the next carnal session).  Don't worry about sounding stupid.. practice makes perfect!


Raise your hand if you have a tattoo.  If you tell me it hurt (pain, not discomfort) while you were getting it, I can probably guess the relative placement: either the underneath part of the arm, or somewhere where there isn't much padding between skin and bone.

Yes, I'm going somewhere with this.

I'll spare you the biology lesson of why those spots hurt more than others (google is your friend) and skip directly to: what's the flip side of pain?

Pleasure.

So.... think of where there isn't much padding, and aim in that direction:

- Ears.  This is a dicey one, so tread very carefully.  I for one **hate** having a tongue stuck in my ear, and there is nothing anyone can say/do to convince me otherwise.  Children torture other children with 'wet willies' for a reason, folks.  If you do attempt tongue insertion, make sure it's fairly dry.. that way if the person reacts negatively, they won't spend the remainder of the evening trying to get saliva out of their ear canal.  The ear shell, on the other hand- and that includes the lobe- is fair game.  Especially when the game involves nipping.  ;)  Be careful of earrings!

- Neck/jaw/collarbone.  Licking is perfectly acceptable here.. so is biting, or scratching.  But please do keep in mind that the majority of us left high school some time ago, and our coworkers/bosses may not be as amused by hickeys as our peers were.  Also, if you're going to try the 'hand-around-the-throat' move, PLEASE make sure you're doing so in a safe manner- don't cut off your partner's breathing unless you have consent and a safety signal in place. 

- Inside of the wrist.  Confession time: this is guaranteed to send me into overdrive. Quivering, gasping, blackout-level overdrive.  Probably why I have such a thing for being tied up (and why I can't bear to wear a watch on a regular basis).  ;)  Watch the tendons, and be extra careful if your partner has carpal tunnel syndrome.

- A lot of folks swear by the back of the knee.  I'm too ticklish for that to ever work as an arousal technique, but that doesn't mean you can't give it a go with your partner!

- Point of the hips.  This works a little better on guys, and happens to be one of my favorite parts of the male anatomy.  Have the gentleman in question lay on his back, legs spread and slightly bent (aim for comfort, here- the legs should be flat on the bed, but wide enough apart that you can fit between them).  Kneel between his legs, run your hands down his sides then in toward where the hip bone protrudes a bit, and rub that spot with your thumbs.. nice, tight circles, while your fingers dig into his hips a bit.  Try not to giggle as he arches completely off the bed.  ;)

- Lower back.  Yes, where the 'tramp stamp' goes.  Hey, it's a popular tattoo spot for a reason!  This one is more for the girls, and is all about subtlety.. the slightest brush of the fingertips over the skin, the barest hint of a kiss, the mere suggestion of warm breath.. mmm. 

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I'd like to take a minute to mention a very specific part of the human anatomy.  Some of you may (rightly) point out that this particular spot falls under the umbrella of the Primal Three, but honestly, I've come across entirely too many people who are clueless about its.. mm.. usefulness, which is a total shame.  If it helps, consider this a public service announcement.  :)

I'm talking about the perineum.

For those of you who aren't into the whole 'official terms for bits and pieces' thing, that's the area from the anus to the back of the scrotum in males, and the anus to the back of the vagina (technically vulva, but let's not get any more technical than we are) in females.

Not a big deal in most women; however, with the right pressure and timing, can drive a guy utterly mad.  If you or your partner aren't into anal play, this is an excellent substitute, as pushing on the perineum applies pressure to the prostate (I've rewritten this sentence three times, and can't seem to decrease the number of 'p' words..).  Here's how it works: let's say you're in process of orally satisfying your partner.. of course such things never just involve mouths, your hands should be busy as well.  Slide one hand between the gentleman's legs, and use two fingers to press upwards and slightly back on the fleshy area just behind the testicles (if you curl your fingers away from your body as you press up, that gives you about the right angle). Be extra careful if you have long fingernails!  Some guys like a constant pressure, others like circular rubbing.. this is where communication and watching your partner's reactions come in handy.

True story:  I gave a hands-on demo once in college for some of my hallmates on proper blowjob technique (umm.. I should probably clarify that my hallmates were female, and the demo model was my very willing boyfriend at the time).  One of my hallmates had an impending meeting with an internet crush, and minimal (read: no) real-world experience, so I taught her (and several other curious friends) the basics, including the aforementioned little trick.  Internet gentleman showed up, they disappeared into her room for a day or so, and when they resurfaced he came to my room, dropped prostrate on his knees in front of me, and thanked me profusely.  I giggled for days.

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I know what you're thinking. 'Did he fire six sh..'  Um, oops.  Sorry.  Let me try that again.   'What do I do once I find an erogenous zone on my partner?'  Simple, darlings.. whatever you're inspired to do!  Start with some of the suggestions above, then branch out.  If you notice that a casual brushing of the fingers over the inside of your partner's wrist makes her shudder a bit, see what happens when you run a fingernail over the same area.  Or your lips.  Or your tongue. Or if you take just a bit of the skin between your teeth and bite down, nice and gently at first, but then.. 

::whimper::  Excuse me, I got a little distracted there for a moment. Sorry.  But you get the idea, I'm sure.

Okay class, you're dismissed- go memorize your notes, then get out there and start exploring!